The Idiot's Guide to Slut Shaming

Come on in folks, grab a seat, grab a granola bar, and feel free to chime in at the end.

So first off let's define slut shaming.  Slut shaming is when a woman is labelled as a slut for publicly expressing her sexuality.  And this label of slut is a pejorative and we heap negative attributes on the female showing their sexuality.  And that's really all it is.  So why is this bad?

It is bad because it is a removal of agency from the female on many levels.  Any woman who shows her sexuality openly or uses her sexuality as a means of employment or advantage is doing so to serve the patriarchy and is being abused! *bzzzzt* Wrong.  While that can be true in many circumstances, prostitution comes to mind but even that can be a grey area, when it comes to entertainers (eg Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, Madonna, etc.) their use of sexuality might be exploitative.  But to assume that right from the start is to immediately state that any woman who expresses her sexuality is only doing it for a male audience and at their behest.  Really? So women cannot display their sexuality as a man might and enjoy it?

As a comparison, has anyone thought that Fabio, who's entire career is celebrating the inherent sexuality of his looks and body, was being exploited by the matriarchy? The only reason he did it was because women would only accept him as such?  What about Barry White?  What about Kinsey?  Are these individuals, with careers that are defined by exploring their sexuality, doing so without agency?  When you assume that there is no possibility of agency you are dehumanizing and marginalizing an individual without thought.  That's a bad thing in case you were wondering.

The second part of agency it takes away is the ability to be seen as an individual rather than as a sexual object.  When a man expresses his sexuality or acts as a sexual object, he can go back to being a man afterwards.  A woman who expresses her sexuality is now only a sexual object and she should expect to be treated as such at every turn.  This is the same bullshit that lends itself to rape culture.  A woman who dances with a man provocatively at a club must want sex, and if she doesn't give it up willingly then a man has the right to take sex by force.  The parallel is so blindingly similar I always get a little surprised when I hear a woman say it.

Slut shaming is also very much a means to control women's sexuality.  There are no limits to how a heterosexual male can express their sexuality.  He can be crude, romantic, pervy, suggestive, or lacking any sexuality.  A woman can only be a thinly defined line of sexuality, where she is to perform sexually in only specific situations for specific reasons.  Part of the problem we're encountering right now with female sexuality is a great many woman just aren't accepting this thin line of definition anymore.  And because that definition has been around so long and accepted as a part of a feminist view point of sexual explotation of women via porn, prostitution, and stripping, this new turn is causing a re-examination of the identity of female sexuality.  And let's be honest, even smart people are fucking lazy and refuse to think about things before just relying on the same old argument they've always used.  Sometimes intelligent people are the WORST at this because they know they're intelligent and assume they've given the situation proper thought.  Guess what, we usually haven't.

So that's the deal folks.  That's the idiot's guide to slut shaming and why it's a bad thing.  So knock it the fuck off ok?