Yep, it's almost three in the morning, and I can't sleep. I have lots of munchies, you might partake of the snap peas, or perhaps you want some of the noodles. Either way, enjoy.
Folks, this whole mental health thing is tiring. I'm exhausted. I try very hard every day to spend an hour or more going through my cornucopia of demons and fighting them has sapped me. I'm grumpy, short tempered, and it is very tempting to fall back into bad habits, and isolate myself because really, I'm just one big mental and emotional bruise and everything feels just horrible.
This is not to say I'm not getting better. I am. I've eliminated a lot of my automatic negative behaviors, I've stopped a lot of my anxiety about the potential outcome of things, and I'm taking the time to grieve for the many losses I've suffered recently. So I am getting better. It's just really fucking hard.
So I'm tired, but my brain won't stop buzzing, so much so it's caused more migraines in the last few weeks than I had all of last year.
So here's what I'm going to ask. If you can take the time to stay positive with me, I'd love to hear from you about any good thing that has happened to you. I want to surround myself with some nice stories about fabulous things that made you smile, laugh, or just comfortable. I want to see your smiles, your pets, your comforts, and I would love to just drown in those things for a while. Because those are the connections I need to see for my own blessings. You can respond here, or twitter, or text, or call. I like phone calls. I love to talk and listen.
And if I start to sound like an asshole, feel free to just say so. I need to hear that too.
1 comment:
Sometimes you sound like an asshole, but you sound like an asshole I love very much so that's okay.
Here are some good things for you to hear about:
1) My hair looks awesome today, and smells all minty. Minty hair is nice.
2) I'm reading a book I love so much that when I talk about it, my hands flap uncontrollably.
3) #PrincessSassypants and #Bumblebutt make me laugh daily. They're total dorks. Just like me.
4) I'm very proud of you.
5) A deep-sea diver got hugged by a giant octopus recently.
6) Some dudes saved nineteen manatees from where they were stuck in a storm drain. This is both heartwarming and ridiculous, considering how big manatees are and how little storm drains are and how the fuck did they get in there but it doesn't matter because now they're FREE which is kind of probably an allegory to something in American politics too but I don't know what.
7) Fred from Esso fixed a thing and didn't charge me for it and I didn't even know that the thing inside the thing could come out, but it turns out it does and my thing inside the thing was busted so Fred from Esso fixes it while I waited.
8) Bees (honey bees, not wapses)
9) Feathers
10) spring is coming.
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